Passion & Purpose (pt. 2)

In May 2017 my ketones journey began.  I had been following a keto diet for a few months and felt a slight improvement in my brain fog and energy, but when I added exogenous ketones to the mix change really started to happen.  Within 7-10 days my brain turned back on after so many years of running with the “low power” light on and a constant short circuit when it came to getting my thoughts to actually make it to my mouth in one piece.  That was huge for me and quite emotional.  Previously I felt like an idiot.  I’d try to get involved in conversations for a while yet my smartness was stuck in my mind.  By the time it made it to my mouth, i mixed up my words constantly, spoke slower to try to focus on each word at a time and slurred a bit.  It was embarrassing and so frustrating that over time I just avoided the conversations and eventually all social situations.  When things started to come back online, the relief was incredible!  That alone had me totally on board, and there were many other improvements I experienced as well.  I finally had energy to get through the day, I finally started to sleep well and wake up feeling rested, I became less of a sad or grumpy b**ch, and I finally began to regain feeling in my legs!  Picture for a second doing box jumps with no feeling in your legs.  The Crossfit Open workout 17.1 was traumatic for me in a whole different way! Yes, most people suffered through that one, but the mental freak out of not being able to feel whether my feet had actually landed on the box or not was terrifying.  I’ve always had the FU MS mentality and did it anyway, but now two years later, it’s difficult to even imagine going back to that added challenge on top of an already challenging sport!

The changes I experienced were so profound that anyone who knew me took notice.  This girl who was previously so quiet, spacey and sad looking was transforming before their eyes.  When you experience something like this, it’s hard not to want to shout it from rooftops.  I knew there were so many others who were suffering through their own battles and wanted to share this piece of hope and possibility with the world.  Over the last 2 1/2 years I have shared in so many awesome journeys and I am so grateful to be a part of it all!  My message to you – if there’s anything in your life that you aren’t happy with, chose something different.  Everything we do serves us somehow, and for some, the role of the victim serves them enough to not be open to taking responsibility and moving forward.  I made a choice a long time ago that the victim was not how I wanted to live my life, and when I opened my mind to exploring, learning, experimenting, the world of possibilities open up for me.

I will drink ketones for the rest of my life.  I will eat a diet that best supports my brain and body, and I will avoid the foods that don’t!  Right now, the carnivore diet has been serving me very well, and for the time being that’s where I plan to stay.  That being said, I will never close my mind to other options.  People ask all the time how I’m able to stick with such a “strict diet”.  The best response I’ve got is:

MS is much more restrictive. Eating food is just a small portion of my time, and I don’t depend on it to bring joy to my life.  Living with MS would take 100% of my time, and I guarantee there’s no joy in any of that.

Birth of a Passion & Purpose (pt.1)

So for years I really struggled with annoying, debilitating or painful symptoms that I was just told were to be expected for someone with a multiple sclerosis diagnosis.  I didn’t know any better, so I just assumed this must be true.  I was raised to believe that the doctor had all the answers, and whenever you didn’t feel well, that was the route to go.  I think the first time I started to question in my own mind if this was may not the truth was when although I was doing everything I was told, I was still getting sicker and sicker and my doc said “yeah, I don’t know.  Let’s keep going, maybe it will get better”  That just didn’t sit well with me!

I first got the idea that food could make an impact when I stumbled upon a TEDx video in 2012 from Dr Terry Wahls who had reversed her MS symptoms through diet.  I wish I could shake her hand and thank her directly, because this one video was the start of the journey over the next 7 years of my life which took me from a point of wondering when I’d have to cave and go on disability, to feeling better than ever have.  It wasn’t a direct path.  It wasn’t sunshine and rainbows the whole way, and there were definitely many times along the path where I was tempted to throw in the towel on the whole thing.  There were even times where I felt like “if this is the way my life is going to be, I don’t really want to be alive”, however today I can tell you the journey was so worth even the biggest of bumps in the road.

In 2012 I made a pretty major diet change.  I was the multigrain cheerios with almond milk junkie, who counted calories, ate lots of carbs and avoided fat like it was ultimate enemy of life.  Pretty much the complete opposite of the protocol Dr Wahls was suggesting, but I was so tired of living the life I was living that I was willing to give it a try.  I wanted off the laundry list of meds I was living on, and I wanted the ability to start dreaming of the life I wanted again, knowing I actually had the chance to make that a reality.

Paleo = no grains, no sugar, no processed foods, no legumes, no dairy.  Long story short, real foods don’t have ingredients.  Steak = steak.  Apple = apple. Carrot = carrot. Focus on those.  Did this diet help?  Yes.  Eliminating all the processed crap is a good idea for pretty much everyone, in my opinion, however while I did feel some changes, I still felt there was more to the story yet I didn’t know what that was.  After 5 years of following the Paleo approach, I was still living with cognitive struggles, chronic fatigue, and 24/7 nerve pain that was really threatening my mental health.  In 2017 I was at the point of thinking “if I’m destined to live in pain forever, I don’t want to live anymore.” When I was in the darkest of dark places, my girlfriend encouraged me to try this ketones supplement thing a friend had been talking about.  It was another of those times in my life where I was desperate for hope, and really had nothing to lose.  I was also a major critic!  I had try things in the past and just ended up disappointed, but I owed it to Amanda to at least try.

Major Rant

I’m at the point where I need to say this.  I’ve held back for quite a long time because I’m nice and don’t like to offend anyone, however sometimes a little anger can be the spark that leads to massive change.

If you’re not happy with your life, albeit your health, your body, your happiness, your marriage, your job, etc and you’re not actively working to improve it, stop complaining.  Take responsibility for the fact that your life is up to YOU.

Where do I feel I got the nerve to make such a bold statement? 14 years ago I was diagnosed with MS.  I had a little pity party for myself, then picked myself up and carried on.  I listened to my doctors and did what I was told, but continued to decline in quality of life.  One day I realized I need to take my power back.  I didn’t blame my doctors for their ignorance in actually helping me.  I didn’t blame god/the universe/or whatever you call it.  I didn’t sit there and say “well, I guess it just is what it is.”  I also didn’t accept that MS was WHO is am.  Yes, it’s a part of me, but it does not define me.

I’m at the point today where I needed to share this because I’ve spent the last 2 years working to share my story and help others and faced so many situations where people struggle to see that they have the power to at least work towards improving their situation.  Yes, I sell a supplement that has been so incredibly life-changing for me that I think everyone could benefit from at least trying it, yet that’s not at ALL what this post is about!  I don’t know if anyone is solely responsible for giving themselves MS, yet even if I am, it was doing the best I could with the tools I had at the time.  Whether or not your situation is the result of actions you have taken, I’m not placing any blame on anyone, however I can pretty much guarantee blaming anyone or anything else for your situation is just crap.  Shit happens, but it’s how we deal with it and move forward that matters!  What small steps could you take TODAY to help improve your situation?  Who do you know who’s been where you are and gotten where you want to be?  Start there.  Find out HOW they’ve done it and get moving.